One-Hit-Wonder Wednesday the Third! I Think! Probably Fourth!

I feel like I had a different one-hit wonder in mind, but this'll do just fine.

So apparently Spin Doctors are coming out with a new album!  Like, kinda soon actually.  And playing a show somewhere in Illinois.  Which is probably free because it's the Spin Doctors.  And I am so there.

You know, I just remembered, I did a random bullshit-ass post about the Spin Doctors like a couple months ago.  Hm.

Well have m0ar!

Seriously?  You really didn't see this coming?

Yesterday's Zeitgeist: A Series of Songs You Won't Find Elsewhere (Part 2)

And we're back!  Starting with...

8. Flat Out Fucked by Mudhoney

...a band you actually may have heard of!  Dirty grunge riffing, dirty grunge yelling, dirty grunge solo...  I feel like there's a theme to this one, but I just can't put my finger on it.

9. Range Life by Pavement

Really doesn't get much more 90s-indie than Pavement.  Chill yet melodic, good melodies.  Czech it out.

10. I Was a Stranger by Smog

For whatever stupid reason, Blogger can't find any of the videos I found for this song, so here's a link:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cYGraw-3rLA

Dat pedal steel.
For real doe; Bill Callahan, folks.  Recorded under the name "Smog" for a long time.  Bit of an unsung hero of alt-country.

11. Down with the Bass by fIREHOSE

Dear whoever was in charge of making a VEVO for fIREHOSE: you had ONE JOB.  You made it FireHOUSE and now this is me yelling at you in LOTS OF CAPS.
So I'm not sure what bass fIREHOSE is saying "down with", whether that be a specific bass guitar, the rash of wobble bass in today's music (though that would've required some sort of precognitive abilities on fIREHOSE's part, not entirely unlikely), or the fish and they're just mispronouncing it, but I say up with the bass when it comes to this song.  Holy spumoni that's groovy.
("Up with the bass"?  "Holy spumoni"?  Really phoning it in, aintcha Thomas?)

12. Don, Aman by Slint

So, apparently Slint is "sadcore".  I also learned that I must have a serious sadcore influence, cuz this is the kind of shit I like to write from time to time.  And by "from time to time", I mean "like half the time".  Minus the spoken word-y vocals.
I don't know what a sadcore is, but if most of it's like this, then it's pretty cool.

13. Guest List by Screeching Weasel

Holy shit, pop punk before pop punk was a thing.  Except, you know, good.  Just kidding!  There's good pop punk.  Somewhere.
And they're from Chicago too!  Water ya know.

14. Tiger Trap by Beat Happening

Damn listen to them opening chords.  Slash, the chords that play throughout the song.  Cuz I think they're like the same ones played in different orders, for six minutes.  If you're into mellow, super-texturey three-chord songs, give it a whirl.  Good chance you'll love this.  Even if you're not, give it a go anyway.  The alternative is eating a plate of balls.  Whole plate of 'em.  You think I'm lying.  I have a plate of balls on hand.  It will go in your mouth.

To Be Continued!  ...Again!

Yesterday's Zeitgeist: A Series of Songs You Won't Find Elsewhere (Part 1)

Y'all may have noticed that title sounds like something off a particularly pretentious "special issue" of Rolling Stone.  Well it should.  Cuz this is something like that.

A teacher o' mine, Brian Costello of the Functional Blackouts (it's a band, look 'em up), recently clued me in on a list of songs he thought captured the spirit of the particular decade that this blog pays homage to.  In case you haven't been paying attention, that's the 90s.  He didn't offer his opinions on any of them, just cranked out this list with a "Whoomp, they it is."  Okay, he didn't say that, and I don't think those are the exact words of whoever made that song, but here it is.

I'll admit the title is a bit misleading.  When I say these are songs "you won't find elsewhere", I don't mean I synthesized them out of the ether.  They do actually exist.  They're just not the first 90s one-hit-wonders (those that even had a hit) that come to mind.

1. Hate Song by Fudge Tunnel

Grunge, sludge, noise.  It's like a collection of things I love without getting all poetic, using terms like "ugly melody" and "catharsis" and "raw emotive anti-shred something-or-other".  It's easy to see the influence on 90s metal acts to come, like Tool (shit, that intro/outro would be right at home on Undertow), more nu metal bands that came a couple years later.

2. Skip Steps 1 & 3 by Superchunk

Ah yes; the days when "alternative rock" didn't mean "what the fuck else do we call it".  Catchy-as-shit motif?  Check.  Fuzz?  Check.  Chick bassist?  Check.  In spite of the quality songwriting, this song still remains bouncy and fun in a way that only the 90s could offer.

3. My Pal the Tortoise by Thinking Fellers Union Local 282

Proto-Cake.
Actually, I like this more than Cake.
The band, not the food.
Cake (the food) is the best.
Cake (the band) is still good.

4. Break a Promise by Guv'ner

Around here, I realized that anyone who thinks the indie rock of today is a totally new/original thing miiiiggghhht just need a slapping.
Poorly organized thought.
Translation: This song is good, strangely made me feel like slapping a hipster.

5. Revolution Part 1 and 2 by Butthole Surfers

Okay, you may have heard of Butthole Surfers.  I love Butthole Surfers.  They're one of few (okay, many) bands that can make songs that where I'm going "what even is this" the entire time, and I still love it.  That's not very subjective.  I don't care.  It's Butthole Surfers.  Listen to it.

6. Tragic Carpet Ride by Polvo

Something about these dissonant riffs, man...  Grows on you like dick fungus before the song's even half over.  In a totally good way.  Assuming dick fungus is bad.

7. (You Must Fight to Live) On the Planet of the Apes by The Mummies

This is a song by a band comprised of a bunch of grown men that play dressed as mummies.  By which I mean they play music while wrapped in toilet paper (or maybe it's actual gauze; I'm sure they've used both).  If that alone isn't a reason to love it, I don't know what is.  Besides the fact that it's dirty, wicked (with a proper touch of silly) 90s garage-punk at its best.

To Be Continued!

When I Need Some Sleep

Since I was little, I've had trouble sleeping.  Not regularly; I wouldn't call myself an insomniac.  Most days, I get to sleep just fine.  Maybe not as "just fine" as most people, but still.  Just fine.  Even on the "just fine" days though, I still find myself thinking about getting to sleep.  This is a huge pain in the ass; my ultimate bane; probably the root of why I sometimes suck at sleeping.

I understand that almost everyone has bouts of sleeplessness, from time to time.  It's not quite the same for me.  My Sleepless and Sleepwell periods last at least a week for the former, and thankfully about three for the latter.

I have a series of - I don't know what to call them - exercises? systems? protocol? processes? a series of somethings that I do to encourage sleep.  I get out of my headspace.  I stare at various objects or surfaces in the room, wrap my mind's eye around them, make myself be less aware of the various aches and grievances in my body at the moment.  I focus on my breathing.  I've had so much practice doing full-stomach-breathing or whatever it is (where you expand your stomach, not your chest) that I'm pretty sure I do it regularly now.  I try to control my imagination as much as possible, calling up dreamy images, rather than stories or events (real or imagined).

Sometimes these don't work.  Or they just take far longer, and I have so much on my mind that it's hard to put myself back in the world of dreams where none of that shit matters.  Before I developed these various methods, I had a few that involved getting out of bed, doing some things that would put my mind at ease.  Some of these didn't work.  Some of these I borrow from today.  Writing about what's bothering me, drinking some warm milk, masturbating.

There's one I was particularly fond of, even if it didn't actually help me sleep.  I'd get up.  Make my way blindly from my room (I hardly need to put my arms in front of me I know it so well).  Creep downstairs (floor sounds like a hellcat if you make a wrong step).  Turn on first-floor computer.  Listen to "I Need Some Sleep", by Eels.  Listen to it again.  Try (and fail, out of laziness rather than difficulty) to play it on guitar.  Listen to it one last time while looking through what few nostalgic photos I have.

There's something therapeutic, familiar, and all at once cathartic about Eels, this song in particular.  It may not  have really helped me sleep, but it's certainly put me in a better (if more melancholic) place, somewhere where it's easier to keep in mind that I'm not the only one who has this problem; I'm not the only sleepless one.

God damn you, characters of Shrek 2.  This was very nearly a totally serious post.

Hey Look! A One-Hit-Wonder Wednesday That I Actually Remembered!

Kind of.  Cuz it's technically Thursday morning that I'm posting this, but meh.  Semantics.

I wanted this to be one of the first One-Hit-Wonder Wednesday posts, but circumstances just... I dunno, worked more in favor of... not that?  Oh screw you, I don't need to make excuses!  I yam who I yam, dammit.

I don't know when I first heard this song.  Had to be at least three years ago.  In any case, when I first heard it, the only thing I could think was "Holy shit, this has to be the most 90s thing I've ever heard."  The only way it could be more 90s is if LL Cool J took a verse and holy shit I would never stop listening to that.  Seriously, it sounds like if Matchbox 20 and REM had a baby baptized by Third Eye Blind.

Funny story: this song wasn't even written in the 90s.  The first version was recorded back in '89, then re-recorded for this band's somewhat-more-successful sophomore effort.  Yeah, the nineties were invented back in the 80's.

Well, even they didn't invent the 90s, for better or worse, this is the song that invented "adult alternative".  Either way, I think it's pretty great.  Ladies and gentlemen: "Hey Jealousy", by the Gin Blossoms.

A Song About Music

Hey y'all, here's a song!  It's about 90s music, and how I got into it.  With some metaphory stuff.  Turned out to be waaaayyyyy shorter than I thought, but I feel like if I bullshat a bunch more verses, it would just get repetitive.

Also, this whole process of recording and uploading this thing has been rife with technical difficulties, soooooo anything you don't like about it, chalk it up to that.

Since my singing voice is stupid-hard to understand (hey, I'm no Aretha Franklin), here's the lyrics.

It started at my school; the chick who looked like Slash
She played the drums to System of a Down
My branches grew from there

I came down with the sickness
But I was brought to life

Offspring, my skatepunk jams; a town that swallows lives
I'm not a fan of sand; a camp for suicides
Oh Stan, why you so mad
Just to try to understand

Jump ahead to school, do not pass GO
There was a Serbian boy who brought me to Nirvana
There's writing on the walls

Jimmy gave me my feelings
They're both inside this box

Our lady Alice of peace; her chains and garden jams
Marilyn's abyss; together ever since
And it stared back at me
And it stared lovingly

Now let's play Spot The Reference!

And by "let us", I mean you do that.

I don't wanna play with you.

That's right.  I heard the stories.

Very special thanks to Tyler Priest, without whom this project would not be possible!  He does music too and he does it better than me, so go check it out right nnaaooooooooo!

FUCK ARGH BLAH

You heard me.  Fuck argh blah.  I said it and what are you gonna do about it.

So yeah.  Argh.  I forgot the tradition I'd so recently tried to start: One-Hit Wonder Wednesday.  Something so so simple: find a 90s one-hit wonder.  Ramble about it.  Post.  And somehow I managed to fail.  So instead, we're gonna have us a grand ol' One Hit Wonder Saturday.  Wow, that is depressingly uncatchy.

Speaking of depressing!  This here's a one-hit wonder I just recently discovered.  Or re-discovered, maybe. I feel like it's one of those songs that's just kinda there in your head from the get-go.  Like a latent gene for heart disease.  Seems kind of unfair to compare this song to heart disease; I actually quite like it (as much as it bleeds 90s post-grunge).  Jesus, I can't even say I like something without sounding like a twat.  I was in a car this evening, going to my friend's show, and this was on Q101, ahem, 'scuse me, Q87.7.  He claimed to recognize it, we tried to figure it out for a minute, eventually gave up somewhere between The Calling and Matchbox 20.  I marked the time and despite getting a reasonable buzz on and not having access to a computer for seven more hours (yeah I'm one of those rare non-smartphone-owning troglodytes), I managed to remember and look it up.  I didn't even have to write it down.  And that's the most impressive thing I've accomplished all week.

For those of you hankering for your latest fix of mood-rock, full of the pitfalls of youth and suicides and abortion and all that good stuff, ya came to the right place!

Forgive his hair.  Jesus does.  Actually, he probably doesn't.  Forgive it anyway.  Someone has to.